How to Fail at Failing

Failure – something that today’s culture will often hear. Yes, we may be living in a new generation, of high-percentage university graduation events, and climbing technology but in reality, we still find failures. Weakness. Suffering. And recently, I found myself discovering this important truth…

BWBRIDGE copy

A few weeks ago, I failed my driving theory exam – I had never, in my whole life, failed anything before. In fact it still really shames me to talk about it. In my head, it’s something easy to pass, which makes you a complete moron to fail. I’m a little bit frustrated too – I managed to pass all the mock tests that I did! I walked out of that room so angry with myself, that I was silenced…

I wanted to hold onto that silence longer than time would allow, because within 10 minutes I’d told my Dad and was on my way back to college for the best Monday of my life – not. I had the worst day ever. I was tired, still frustrated, confused, and ultimately so upset that I no longer held a track record, of never having failed.

Now I look back, I completely failed at failing. I still do – in fact I’m kind of worried that I’ll fail again next time. It’s as if there’s a mental barrier against all hazard perception videos that exist. Even though I know I can do it, the surprise of failure has knocked me a little bit. It’s put me down in fear.

You see, if we take failure as the end of the world, we will continue to fail. If we revel in our mistakes, we will become so overwhelmed that we no longer remember the truth. I realise this now. Everyone has to fail something. It’s just one of those things. I definitely need to learn how to fail. How to laugh about it, so much that it becomes a joke. I need to learn how to have grace upon myself, at times when I really do need it – amongst my mistakes not around.

My Dad told me, “Well, you’ve got to fail something – it’s not the end of the world. Take it again.” My friend told me, “It’s harder than you think – a lot of people fail first time,” and another said, “Don’t worry about it.”

I initially refused to let any of these words sink in… I was stubborn and I still wanted to be that high achiever – but the thing is, I still am! Perhaps, I will have to try again, and perhaps yes it is a little frustrating but if we learn to slowly accept failure, admit our weaknesses, and persevere, then failure is such a great experience. I’m slowly learning to trust that fact. And I’ve booked my test again…

Be prepared to fail, try not to be frustrated and surround yourself in the graceful words of others. Oh, and pray for my next attempt if you please!

Eleanor ♥

2 thoughts on “How to Fail at Failing

  1. The theory test was probably what I found hardest about the whole learning to drive experience. I too failed first time, but I went back in, head held high and passed second time. You’ve got to just see the first time as a practice, at least for the second time you know exactly what to expect. You’ll go in and pass with flying colours i’m sure. 🙂

    • Thank you so much! Sorry this reply is so delayed! Your were right though – I took it again last Wednesday and I passed!

Leave a Reply

  • (will not be published)

You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>